[Philip Wybenga is a freelance writer for MonsterVine.com and an undergraduate student in Cognitive Psychology at UC San Diego. He really likes the Legend of Zelda franchise.]
Chapter 1: The origins of insanity
There is a young blond princess who plays the typical damsel in distress and gets caught by this muscle-bound evildoer. Naturally you, the protagonist, respond to this like any other simple-minded farmer. Take your pillowcase and wear it like a hat, suit up in your green shirt and tights, brandish sword and shield, and go on a rampage and kill shit, that’s what!!! Yeah…that’s the normal life.
But seriously, lets get a reality check. It’s 1986 and legendary creator Shigeru Miyamoto had yet another creation to bless the gaming community. Millions the world over did not suspect the torrent that would enrapture them inevitably. The Legend of Zelda. This legendary masterpiece in software has revolutionized the gaming world and provided for Nintendo a new product to goad hungry gamers to a new obsession: people now have the tendency to save the world at all costs; this includes but not limited to: stealing, killing, the abuse of chickens with a sword to the point where PETA would bitch slap you for money in litigation, STDS from getting laid with fairies in kinky clothing with fairy crack/dust, taking advice from a large shining fly that endorses your schizophrenia….and tights. To raise money for your obsessions you barge into houses, break pots, and all but rape the lady in the house out of all her hard-earned rupees. Yes we have all been there. Ah the gifts of being a sexy elf. Everyone loves his endearing charm. That’s why you are the one dressed in a green tunic and pillowcase, not like the normal person who can distinguish games from reality. Not you. Like the happy go lucky Tingle you love to spread your manly “tinkle charmsâ€. Young and old, The Legend of Zelda is a series that we all wished to aspire. Like Morgan Freeman’s voice, The Legend of Zelda calls us, compels us, rapes our very minds, and does this with a soothing tone that all the while guides us to the holy light of the Triforce. Welcome to the world of Link, the Hero of Time.
Chapter 2: Trying to deal with reality
When you start to get introduced to the greatness that is Zelda, you start to realize something that may possibly downplay your now complete and fulfilled life: You realize it’s not your life that you are living in the least. That’s right. You are living the life of a virtual elf. Enough of role-playing, you need to get past this insanity. Fairies are not going to tell you what to do next in life, you don’t have a menu screen that contains all your seemingly limitless weaponry that you carry, and you will NOT be getting laid after saving a blond girl from the big bully. Its unfortunate, but Link goes on an adventure and kicks ass, whereas the average fan boy can only fantasize about saving the world one step at a time, but first he needs to take out the trash that is clustering his mom’s basement. Harsh reality, easy to like the epicness that is the Legend of Zelda series.
Chapter 3: The gaming experience (aka epicness piled on epicness convoluted by mind-blowing epicness. EPIC)
The Legend of Zelda series began, of course, with the first entry of the series simply titled The Legend of Zelda. Humble beginnings, this game came out on the original Nintendo gaming console, the Nintendo Entertainment System, in 1986. The concept to the experience was simple: an adventure overworld-based system where one charming elf protagonist named Link, wielding sword and shield, has the goal of saving a kidnapped princess who happened to be named Zelda. This game did not bring graphically stunning gaming to the consumer when first released, nor did it provide really any revolutionizing concepts to the gaming industry at the time in comparison to preceding games on the console. However, what it lacked in graphical power, it made up in finesse. Hands down one of the best games in history, the game was simply a blast to play, even by today’s standards of virtual gaming. Like the sequels following it, The Legend of Zelda had the system of making the player venture into eight main dungeons, where within each dungeon lie ingenious puzzles that serve as obstacles to challenge Link’s progress and past that lurks the main boss that must be defeated to acquire a certain artifact, in this case a piece of the Triforce of Wisdom. The sequels to this game followed this template, but of course each addition to the series added its own unique twist to the experience by new plot developments, enhanced graphics, and technical innovation to the overall gameplay. This is evident in recent sequels, such as with the case with one of the latest entries The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass, where playing the game was completely reliant on touch screen mechanics. The legacy of the first installment of the Legend of Zelda is, putting it lightly, deeply rooted in the conventional gaming experience of today, and in its beginning stages an inspiration for the introduction of the role playing genre. No one can deny the scope of its influence, and that is that the sphere of influence of Zelda is limitless. I may certainly have a bias to the extent of Zelda’s importance…but I am right! So don’t argue!
