Spoiler Alert
Developer: MEGAFUZZ
Price: $3
Platform: PC
Spoiler alert: gimmicks are bad and you should feel bad for making a game rely entirely on a bad gimmick. Spoiler Alert’s entire premise is that you start the game at the credits and work your way back through the game in reverse which is a nifty idea that unfortunately isn’t executed very well. I honestly had more fun writing this review than playing the actual game. Hell, I spent more time writing this damn thing than playing the game.
I know a lot of people like to make cracks about how indie games belong on Newgrounds or on the free section of your phone’s app store, but holy shit this game actually does belong in those places. The $8 this game was originally priced at feels like some straight up highway robbery; even at the lowered price it’s asking for too much. I’d pay a dollar tops for this and only if I was bored out of my mind and had nothing else to play on my phone. Even then I’d still get that feeling you get when you buy some late night Taco Bell and you feel sort of dirty about eating it afterwards.
The game itself is pretty simple, if you see a crushed enemy coming up you need to jump on it to bring it back to life. Coins need to be dodged if they weren’t picked up and transparent coins need to be un-picked up. Messing up on any of these things will cause a time paradox and restart the level which isn’t too bad since each level lasts 10 seconds tops and restarting is instant. The main issue with this game is that it just isn’t fun at all. You have a fixed jump arc which can be annoying as hell to time since each jump has to be exact or else you’ll have to start the brief level over again; the fixed arc of the jump just feels really shitty and imprecise too.
Don’t expect the game to spice things up later because it doesn’t bother to introduce any major changes to the formula besides minor things like oil or mud that speed you up or slow you down. You’ll go through its hundred levels dodging the same coins and jumping on the same enemies in stages that last seconds. Each level even feels like an exact copy of the previous one but with rearranged hazards. The game introduces a single special ability per world like rolling or catching fireballs you fired but the game once again does nothing interesting with these ideas. For some dumb reason the game decides takes your newly acquired power just a few levels after you got it too. It’s super annoying how many cool ideas that are in this game that aren’t explored at all. It really doesn’t help that the game is just way too easy and only gets mildly, mildly difficult in the last five levels. Once you finish all three worlds you’ll unlock the bonus world which shockingly has some actual challenge in it. Well, only half the levels have some challenge but hey, five out of ten levels being sort of difficult is a whole lot better than five out of ninety. Having a game play in reverse can work really well (just look at Retro/Grade), but only if you put some effort into making your gimmick something interesting and engaging.
Spoiler Alert’s gimmick feels nifty at first, but repetition starts to kick in way too early in a game that’ll last you 20-30 minutes tops. Seriously, when I finished the game I quickly popped the Steam overlay up to see how long I had been playing and saw 46 minutes logged in the game. Knock 10 or so minutes off since I had left the game up for a while since I went to go eat something real quick and you’re left with a half hour of mashing the jump button. If anyone tells you this game will last you more than an hour please direct them to me so that I can call them a liar. In less than an hour I finished all three worlds, the bonus world, watched the credits, and even played a few user created levels before finally realizing I had done everything. Sure, I could go back and gold star the very few levels I got silvers in but why would I want to put myself through that again?
I guess a positive thing about the game is how simple the level editor is with its drag and drop interface, but when your game’s levels are so shitty I’m praying the community did something decent with your level editor you know you fucked up. The game has Steam Workshop support too but half of the user created levels are either half assed tests or straight up don’t work; apparently people think it’s hilarious to upload levels you can’t beat. Spoiler Alert is a huge disappointment because there’s a neat concept here, but I just wish it was in a game that was actually fun to play.
The Final Word
It’s rare when I feel straight up insulted when I play a bad game but Spoiler Alert actually managed to reach that point for me with its Fisher Price approved difficulty and garbage gameplay mechanics.
– MonsterVine Rating: 2 out of 5 – Poor
