2019! What a year! 60 years since we landed on the moon! A stark and amazing reminder of the progress and power of the human spirit! I, like most of you, spent a good portion of my time this year in my room crying about anime girls. BUT MORE ABOUT THAT LATER. We’re here to talk about GAMES, one of the many achievements that the indomitable human will helped achieve in the last 50 years, and led to all of that anime cryin’.
2019 had a lot of games that came out. I can’t remember all of them, but sure bought most of them. Here are my favorites in no real order except for one of them. Which is objectively the best game that came out this year, disregard any lists that say otherwise.
Control
Literal minutes into Control, you’re walking into the dimly fluorescent lighting of the Oldest House and something just feels off. Like that, something spooky is going on off. That Fox Mulder looking at a new case off. I walked around for a few more minutes before texting Diego (Review Manager of this very site) and saying that this game was extremely my shit. So, how did I feel about the rest of this game? It is EXTREMELY my shit. I live for the weird shit that exists just outside the fringes of sight and thought. Paranormal happenstances, weird extra dimensional creatures, freaky ass puppet shows, SIGN ME THE FUCK UP. Tie that in with some phenomenal combat, and some great world building and you probably have the best new property of 2019.
I AM STOKED FOR THAT ALAN WAKE EXPANSION 10/10
Link’s Awakening
Hey, so like every other 20 something white male, I really like Zelda. Crazy right? This is a really good one of those. I played this like literally right after playing through Link to The Past again, and I think this is a better game? The cutesy toy vibe creates a real good contrast with the super melancholy story. Like, fuck is this game sad at times. I have this habit whereI screenshot moments in games that get me emotionally; I got quite a few in this one. Anyway, this game is real good. You should play it.
YOU WALK A CHAIN CHOMP AND STAB KIRBY WITH A SWORD 10/10
Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night
Man, I love Castlevania. I love the vibe of Castlevania. I love the way Castlevania plays. I love the music of Castlevania. I love how you can break the hell out of Castlevania. THIS GAME HAS ALL OF THAT. Dude said he wanted to make Symphony of the Night 2 and he fucking did it! This game has no pretensions of telling a serious story, it knows what you want: To murder demons with knife boots to rockin’ tunes. It’s also not afraid to get dumb as fuck and have you turn into a bunny girl, or have a secret 8 bit boss, or have nine dullahammer heads follow you around. This is straight up some of the most old fashioned fun I had this year.
YOU CAN DO JOJO POSES AND ONE OF THE FINAL SPELLS IS ZA WARUDO 10/10
Pokémon Shield
If you’re a dexiter, you’re a bitch. If you picked sword you’re a bitch. If you didn’t pick God’s perfect angle Sobble, I feel sorry for you and you should rectify your mistake. This is a real good Pokémon folks. I literally played through all of the best Pokémon’s this year. I’m talking: Black 2, Heart Gold, Emerald; you know the works. You’re probably going, “That’s a lot of Pokémon!” and you’re right. Of the 8760 hours permitted to me this year I probably spent close to 300 on Pokémon. Quarter life crisis will do that to ya.
So why’d I do it? Well I wanted to get a living dex (All 807 for the Poke illiterate) for these games, AND BOY DID THAT BLOW UP IN MY FACE. Despite that set back I still bought the $120 double pack, because, your boy really fucking likes Pokémon if that isn’t clear yet. That moment where you walk into the wild area for the first time is magical. It’s how you imagined Pokémon as a kid.
The camp feature is also great, I had a group of people collectively go “Awwww” when we saw Togepi run up to greet us. This is literally the first time in the franchise’s 20 year history where you actually get a feel for the individual Pokémon’s personalities outside of what the dex tells you and it’s magical.
GETTING CHASED BY A HIGH LEVEL GENGAR IS THE SCARIEST MOMENT OF THE YEAR 10/10
Dragon Quest 11S: Definitive Edition
I have a pretty big problem with RPGs, I love them, they’re my favorite genre, but 9 times out of 10 I usually leave them unfinished. It’s my greatest shame, I usually fall out of the story in some way, or just don’t have the time to invest and fall off. BUT NOT THIS BAD BOY. This is the most meat and potatoes JRPG I’ve ever played, but christ if it’s not the most delightful thing I’ve played in years. All the monsters have great pun names, the gameplay is smooth and challenging when it needs to.
And like, the story is good. Like real good. Yeah, it’s pretty generic high fantasy JRPG fare, but it’s told SO WELL and the characters are SO GOOD. Ugh, the trials and tribulations they go through, how everyone grows by the end. THIS GAME MADE ME CRY Y’ALL.
BIG SPOILERS: There’s a big moment towards the end of the game, where you can undo a lot of the bad stuff that happened and save the world from a bigger threat, but it means that your friends lose all memory of you. They literally go out of their way to stop you from doing it, pleading with you not to leave them, and in my case, that worked. I don’t want to lose another ragtag group of anime friends. We’ll just go ride our sky whale instead.
OH YEAH! THERE’S A SKY WHALE 10/10
