So there you are, on a lonely Tuesday or Thursday (take your console pick) night and you’re on social media seeing all your friends giddily sharing pictures of their new next-gen consoles and talking about the new games they’re going to get to play. While the only thing you’re unboxing is that last box of hot-pockets as you prepare for a totally exciting night with your not next-gen console. Don’t worry because like you, I too failed at acquiring a next-gen console. Not because I’m broke mind you, the FB ads Gucci decided to target me with would say otherwise despite my bank account disagreeing with me being the target audience for those ads, but because I didn’t feel a need to jump into this new generation right off the bat as I’ve done before. Fear of missing out is a serious problem though, so that’s why I’m here to recommend ways to alleviate FOMO symptoms.
Live Vicariously Through Someone Else
First off, have you considered the possibility of playing a next-gen vicariously through another person? You could very easily throw up a YouTube video of someone playing Demon’s Souls, grab a controller, and pretend you’re playing along. If the video has commentary, treat them like your friend on the couch and act like you’re having a conversation! If you really wanted to elevate this experience, may I recommend buying a PS5/XSX controller? $60 is much more palatable to the wallet than $500.
Next-Gen Mind Tricks
If you need a more tangible experience, why not simply get the PS4 version of Miles Morales, and as you’re playing simply say aloud how amazing the next-gen graphics are. “Wow, this ray-tracing I’m definitely seeing sure is impressive, and the rumble on what’s definitely a DualSense and NOT a Dualshock 4 sure is a unique experience I’m most definitely having right now”. If you simply fool yourself into thinking you’re playing on a next-gen console, you’ll eventually believe it. The mind is, after all, a powerful thing.
Don’t Worry, I’ll Bring it Back!
If you absolutely need the actual experience and want to live life a little saucy, how about simply breaking into your friend’s house and “borrowing” their console? It is after all, better to ask forgiveness than permission.
I hope these recommendations helped and remember, when you eventually get a PS5 or XSX and your friends laugh at you for being late to the party you can simply flip it on them with the classic “thanks for beta testing the console for me loser” which always makes you look like the winner in any conversation.
